I'm back, I think I can do this.

Today I'll introduce you to my children, some of you know them, and with luck you will know who is who, as I have decided not to use their actual names.  This is because you never know who is reading you really.

Thing 1...Thing 1 is an 11 year old girl, she's full of spirit!  Sadly, she is also full of attitude!  ;-)  Ahh, the joys of having a tween in the house, and she's decided to "go goth" as she puts it.  This is actually fine with her father and I, as neither of us ever fit the mold of the good kids growing up either.  Both rather wild youths!  She's a fabulous kid, a joy to be around most of the time, and my saving grace when dealing with the youngest child.  She's my baby whisperer.  When Monkey can't be soothed, pass him to Thing 1 and he's happy as a pig in slops.  Thing 1 is brilliant, funny, beautiful, amazing, and a real sweetheart.  Basically, most of the time (when the attitude isn't getting in the way) she's a dream child.  Thing 1 is in 6th grade this year, and as extras she takes karate, with luck some swimming lessons next month, possibly a cooking class, and she has a knitting class once a week as well.  One night a week she cooks with me also.  I figure if we are home schooling, it's best to make sure we cover everything we need to!  She is artistic, VERY artistic and has drawn some really neat stuff.  She loves to write, haiku, poems, short stories, plays whatever pops into her mind.  Which as of tonight is a blog of her own.  Seeing as I started blogging last night, she can't wait to give it a try.  Thankfully I have found a free site for teachers to set up blogs for their students, which being a "teacher" now, I have done.  This way she can blog and only those who are able to sign into our account can read it, which a select few people will have the ability to do so.  This makes her happy, and it makes me happy too.  She gets a "real blog", and I get to keep her as safe from the sickos of the internet as is possible for me to do!

Thing 2 is a 10 year old boy.  He's everything you'd expect from a 10 year old geek.  :)  And I mean that in the best possible way.  Thing 2 isn't much on rough and tumble boy games, this is because he's a very small guy for his age.  He's an awesome kid.  He recently informed me that he needs to "smell more manly", and would like Dove for men body wash, or Axe.  He got Axe, as well as Axe deodorant and is much happier using his "man soap".  I think this is because he's got a crush on the girl across the street.  ;-)   He's a WoW gamer, and loves all things PS3, XBox 360, DSi, and PS2.  He also takes karate, and has his night to cook each week as well.  I'll be damned if my son will be trying to come home for dinner every night when he moves out!  ;-)  He will at least know how to make some basic meals, even if it's just spaghetti, chili, stews, soups and the like.  He'll know how to make it, and make it well!  He's pretty handy with Monkey as well, but doesn't have the mothering instincts like Thing 1, which is fine, and understandable.  He's good at many other things.  He's the math man, loves to read, and build with Legos as well.  Very typically boy in many respects.  He's also very sensitive, and I wouldn't change that for anything most days, except when it makes him overly Emo!  Thing 2 is in 5th grade this year.

Beastly, she's a 6 year old girl, and is VERY good at being one.  She's got the temper of a small hurricane and she's not afraid to use it!  I have no clue where she gets it from.  :::innocent look:::  She's in 1st grade this year, and it's her first year home schooling with me.  The others did half the year last year.  She is a super sweet kid when her temper isn't getting the better of her, and loves to help in any way we let her.  One of her favorite things to do is dust!  This is marvelous!  I don't really care for it myself, so I gleefully pass the cloth to her each time I'm cleaning, and she skips merrily about the house, dusting anything that doesn't run or crawl away from her fast enough.  Beastly is also a snuggle bug, she loves to get a good cuddle in on the couch with me or her father.  She'll even settle for Thing 1 or Thing 2 when we aren't able to sit with her.  She ADORES Monkey!  She wants to do so much for him, of course there's not too much I can really let her do yet being 6 years old.  But she loves to help feed him, or bring diapers and wipes, help bathe him, and put his lotion on.  She also LOVES to shop for him and pick out his clothes!  She had some EXCELLENT training from her Aunt Betsy while she lived in Japan also.  Aunt Betsy is an expert marathon shopper!  Beastly is a very cleaver, bright, funny, sweet, evil child!  Beastly is also known for saying some interesting things, such as, "But Mommy, chips are good for your heart!"  Her favorite word right now is literally.  Every thing is literally.  This is fine, but she can't pronounce the letter R, so it comes out sounding like "little willy", the other day her father had an unfortunate emission, and she said, "Eeeew, Daddy that 'little willy' stinks!"  He might have been devastated if he didn't know better!  ;-)

Monkey, the newest member of the crew.  Monkey is a 10 month old boy, and he has recently found that he has a penis.  This was just last night in fact.  During his bath, he looked down to pick up a toy and what did his wondering eyes behold??  A pink thing tucked neatly between his legs.  He couldn't pick it up, it didn't really do anything but kind of wiggle in the water when he kicked his legs or splashed, but he could REALLY get it moving around when he squiggled his fingertip on it!  Oh the fun he had in his bath last night with his new best friend, Penis!  Monkey is trying very hard to learn to walk now, he crawls like the wind, and even plays his own version of soccer if you give him a balloon to crawl after.  He cruises along the furniture, and will let go and stand on his own.  His favorite pass times include eating, napping, nursing, standing naked by the tub slapping the rim while watching his bath fill up, taking the diapers out of the package, eating paper towels or wipes, and of course, as of last night, observing his penis.  He's a very well rounded baby!

Today didn't consist of too much.  A trip to 3 stores on base, the kids store so Thing 2 could get a new rain coat, the NEX so I could buy some time cards for the sailor's cell phone and mine, and the commissary so I could get my Splenda and some salt.  Bedtime went well tonight with minimal howling from Monkey.  He thinks I should just hold him till he is deeply asleep.  Of course being a mother of 4, I don't have time, or the inclination to hold a child to sleep every night.  I'd be shooting myself in the foot with that!  But by the time I had gotten down stairs and turned off the TV (Ahhhh, blissful silence!) he had already stopped and gone to sleep.